Kindness without firmness can lead to permissive parenting and firmness without kindness can lead to punitive parenting. 

The importance is on AND and starts with validating feelings. Offer a choice whenever possible. 

“I know you do not want to brush your teeth and we can do it together.” 

“You want to keep playing and it is time to clean up. I will help, l can do the blocks or books. You decide.” 

“I love you and the answer is no.” 

There are many tools that fall under the kind AND firm concept of parenting. 

1. Validate Feelings 

2. Show Understanding 

3. Distraction and Redirection 

4. Follow Through on an Earlier Agreement 

5. Provide a Choice